12TH SUNDAY IN ORDINARY TIME

Why do you notice the splinter in your brother’s eye, but do not perceive the wooden beam in your own eye?

“You started it!” How many arguments between children end with this accusation? Even as we grow older and our conflicts more complex, our attitude seems to remain much the same. It’s easy to see how the “other” has led to the problem at hand but harder to admit the role we might have played. It’s this tendency toward judgment that Jesus is addressing with his splinter and beam teaching in today’s Gospel (Matthew 7:3).

In moments of disagreement, it’s only natural to magnify your opponent’s mistakes and define this other person by what they’ve done wrong. You believe that your wife is always talking down to you, your husband is always forgetting you, or your friend is always disrespecting you. And you make up your mind that if they would just get their act together, all would be well. But approaching a situation from this posture of blame can quickly turn a conversation into an argument and keep the cycle of disagreement going.

Jesus’ words offer us not only correction but hope. He is showing us one key to breaking cycles of conflict: look at your own actions before anyone else’s. He’s teaching us that the path toward peace begins with an inward glance. It begins by asking the Spirit, “What about me? How did my actions get us here—and what can I do differently?”

When we focus on our own heart first, we see our “beam” more clearly and begin to see our brother or sister and their “splinter” more objectively. And as we consider the ways that we could change, we remember that the “other” isn’t a problem to be solved but a person to be loved. Then the Spirit can soften our hearts and remind us that our goal isn’t to win but to love.

This isn’t easy, but it is the way of peace and the way of Christ. He will give us the grace we need to live it out. Today, ask the Holy Spirit, “Is there any unresolved conflict that you want to overcome in my life? How can I grow in loving your people?”

“Search me, O Lord. Help me to see myself and the people around me the way you do.”

Genesis 12:1-9
Psalm 33:12-13, 18-20, 22
Matthew 7:1-5